Tell the Truth, Dammit

Truth as Freedom

I admire people who speak their truth. What they are saying doesn’t have to be right, make sense or even have the potential to save the world. It’s an authentic, real, raw expression that inspires me (and others) to share the truth that I appreciate.

I recently went for a walk with a friend, more like a soul sister, and we told the truth. We shared things that don’t make easy conversation over cheese and crackers at a cocktail party or polite, digestible sound bites over afternoon tea and scones.

The type of talk we did on our walk is the life changing, eye opening, soul-gazing talk that I am oddly more comfortable with than mild-mannered chit-chat. This type of talk is audacious and bold. This type of talk is the talk that will keep you from drinking alone in the dark or punishing yourself through starvation, over-indulgence or fear of committing–all the things that attempt to keep the truth concealed.

Because what if?

What if they, that big scary blob of a world found out that you didn’t have it all together. That you had fears and made mistakes and lied and perhaps even cheated and borrowed from a lifetime of happiness and contentment by settling on a quick fix or a cheap thrill.

What if…you were merely human and started telling the truth one-by-one and you realized that you were not alone? The world isn’t one big, scary blob of censuring, judging, dissimilar people. The world is made up of you and me and our insecurities our failures and joys and problems and…they don’t define us, anyway.

Once we start telling the truth and moving forward, purging and allowing our junk to go away we don’t have to identify with it anymore. That was then, this is now.

Are you willing to drop the storyline and the self-bashing?

We have the opportunity in the face of every new dawning day to redefine who we are! We are NOT our past. We tell the truth about who we are because it sets us free and ultimately connects us to others who have struggled. When we release the weights of our lives, we rise to the top, to the surface where we can breathe. Imagine that!?

What will you let go today to rise to the top?

Will you release the anchor that has been holding you down and keeping you back?

Are you willing to release yourself by telling the truth (first to yourself) and rise above it?

Your past does not define you.

Every day you get the chance to choose the path you desire.

I tell my clients on the first day I meet them, there is nothing you can do or say that will shock me, surprise me, make me embarrassed or make me not like you, so go for it.

Tell the truth.

Set yourself free from (shame, guilt, disappointment, hurt, expectations, __________).


Be willing to connect with others from a place of truth. You will transform not only your relationships, but your entire life.

Questions, comments, counseling + coaching?

Be in touch.

I am here for you.


In loving-kindness,

Jill Wheeler

Founder of Wellfit Institute

Therapist, Coach, Adventure Guide

  • Christine Citrano

    The truth shall set you free. Free to be you, the authentic you, not the pretend image that will make everyone like you. It takes strength and kindness towards oneself to be truthful. I loved this article and it couldn’t have come at a better time in my life as I find myself searching for the truth of me. Thank you.

    May 2, 2014 at 9:30 am
  • As an interested reader of your newsletter, some thoughts from my side. For me, the article was difficult to understand. I was wondering what truth is. People, who constantly say things that make no sense, are in danger to exclude them from the society and run the risk of no longer being perceived. Socrates: When you talk, please realize that someone could listen to you. I am responsible for what I talk. Look at the totalitarian systems. They all think that they talk the truth. I can’t agree on your statement. Second: No one can agree on, when people make themselves feel bad. But what are the causes? They have learnt from their former environment something. And that is why the environment has to be held accountable also for what it is doing to you. Nobody has come into the world negative and sad. There were (and there still are!) people before who passed on their thoughts and estimations on you. That is the way, we all grew up, didn’t we? And according our committed moral and values we should make an effort to stop those to hurt others. And finally: Yes, the world is often a dangerous place for many. Please do we stop it, to constantly convince them that they can change their destiny so easy. Mankind can often change less than he thinks. One billion of the worlds have no drinking water; one billion are overweight and will suffer from diabetes in future. There are dependencies: political systems, work contracts, laws, values and religions. Who has the right to tell people constantly that they are able to do more and should want more? And by telling them this to make them unhappy? Maybe they were happy before and now feel bad because they see something that they did not see before? The growth of knowledge can cause damage. It is a special form of selfishness. Not everyone can train every day in philosophy – some simply have to do their job. Think, too, of those members of society. Or doesn’t make my comment any sense now? Best Regards

    May 11, 2014 at 3:20 am
  • Thank you for sharing these thoughts Jill. I have often held back from sharing my true feelings in a respectable manner for fear of not being accepted. The truth is that even if I have only a small number of friends who love me for who I really am, I am living much more authentically than if I am constantly holding back or pretending for the sake of acceptance. If we speak with truth (with tact), we can set ourselves free… and know that those who stick around truly love us for who we are at our core.

    July 8, 2014 at 6:57 pm

Post a Comment

− 5 = 1